But if the concept’s going to stick around long enough to survive fad-dom—and I sincerely hope it does—then let’s stop these all-to-cloying stabs at pushing the phenomenon one step further. We need a new, all-encompassing label for farm food. One as simple as the ingredients itself, minus any douchebaggy attempts at cleverness.
Either that, or we need a new batch of even dumber, more cringingly specific labels. To wit:
Farm-to-nostril: That glut of high-end perfumes, body lotions, and room sprays that exploit the trend with scents like “organic lavender” and “field basil.” (See: Whole Foods personal hygiene aisles.)
Farm-to-newstand: The piles of magazines and books now so obsessed with organic eating, sustainable foods, and whole-animal eating, they nearly exclude all other types ingredients and of cooking.
Farm-to-liver: Organic vodkas, gins, and rums. Liqueurs infused with organic fruits and/or herbs. As if you can taste the difference with something that’s 80 proof.
Farm-to-back alley: Marijuana growers who tout their product—hydroponic or otherwise—as superior because it’s lovingly made in small batches by a lifelong farmer.